again to drain another hour of my life participating in the Catholic church’s antics. In certain

contexts, it could be argued that this is a sagacious interrogative, considering all good little

children go to church and those who don’t are atheistic liberal satanofascists; however, I have

already spent over what would be known as in some circles as “a ton of time,” and have grown

weary of the amount of rubbish and claptrap about omnipotent beings and how individual

gametes are sacred being spewed at me by the “morally superior” blowhards who occupy their

time by preaching said bunk. I tried to make my point known for the umteenth time, and my

words fell upon deaf ears. Indeed, my progenitors were ignoring my argument and had begun to

fiddle around with things that belong to me. So it came to pass that I once again attended

another gruelling hour of church; not for worship or out of fear of God, but as a means to

reacquire some of my belongings. And the cycle continues.

Need it be said I am not Catholic, nor of any of the other “big religions,” be it

Islamic, Protestant, Scientologist, et cetera. I have no quarrel with people who do subscribe to

those beliefs, or any others for that matter. In fact, I simply don’t care. If someone believes in

something, so be it. If someone wants to spend countless hours of their time listening to a

pastor ramble on about something or other, so be it. I mean, who am I to say (not literally of

course), “Don’t lick the anus of a dead skunk?” If someone wants to go ahead and make that

decision, they have every right to do so; once the proponents of the cause start spreading the

word of how pleasing the deceased polecat’s rear is to the senses, they begin to enter the realm

of annoying. Far too many times I have answered the door only to find that it’s someone

spreading the word of Jehovah or Xenu or whathaveyou. Mayhaps I am being too harsh.

Mayhaps I am taking the dead skunk metaphor too far. Mayhaps people are too forceful with